Corporate Villains Will Do Anything for a Few Bucks
by Ted Rueter

Imagine the scene:

Your son is hooked on violent video games. Your e-mail account is overrun with spam. Your tap water is a light shade of green because of the nearby chemical plant. Your neighborhood is overrun with the irritating sounds of leaf blowers. A motorcycle gang rumbles down your street every weekend. You've lost your job because of "corporate downsizing." An accounting scandal has wiped out your pension. Your husband gets up at 4 a.m. to go to Labor Ready. Your credit cards are maxed out.

Whatever happened to the promise of American life?

According to recent best-sellers, liberals are responsible for the destruction of America. Talk show host Michael Savage, author of "The Savage Nation," seeks to save America from "the liberal assault on our borders, language, and culture." Conservative gadfly P.J. O'Rourke compiled his own Enemies List, which contends that the likes of Ted Kennedy, Hillary Clinton, Ralph Nader, NOW and the ACLU have single-handedly ruined the United States.

But I propose another explanation for America's travails: corporate villains. Numerous titans of American industry engage in bribery, toxic dumping, tax evasion, profiteering, pillaging, securities fraud, influence peddling, cultural degradation and the destruction of peace and quiet.

Nowadays, America's top CEOs average $37.5 million in annual earnings — more than 1,000 times an average worker's salary. Bill Gates' net worth ($51 billion) is greater than the combined net worth of 40 percent of Americans. Even when they're fired, many corporate honchos get platinum parachutes.

Corporate villains are guilty of many sins. Coal companies pour tons of nitrous oxide into the air, as hundreds of coal miners die each year from black lung disease. Hollywood pumps out violent and vulgar movies, targeted to teens and pre-teens. Recent history is replete with exploding Ford Pintos, cancer-causing Dalkon shields, the Exxon Valdez oil spill, toxic dumping at Love Canal and savings and loan fraud. Crime in the suites is alive and well.

Three individuals stand out as corporate villains:

Andrew Schindler is the chairman and chief executive officer of the RJ Reynolds Tobacco Company. Besides marketing carcinogenic devices, RJ Reynolds is guilty of a particular offense: "Project SCUM" (Subculture Urban Marketing). Project SCUM was RJ Reynolds' scheme to convince gays and the homeless in San Francisco that their lives would be much better if they were addicted to nicotine. The World Health Organization predicts that tobacco-related deaths worldwide will increase from 3 million to 10 million worldwide by the 2020s, with 70 percent of the fatalities in the Third World.

Tom Whalley is the president of Interscope Records. His offense? Interscope is the recording label for Eminem, the violent, misogynist, homophobic rapper. Celebrated as "the hip hop Elvis," Eminem offers such "inventive" lyrics as "put anthrax on a Tampax and slap you till you can't stand." Interscope also brings the world such equally obnoxious "artists" as Marilyn Manson, 50 Cent, Nine Inch Nails and Limp Bizkit.

Robin Pendergast is the chief lobbyist for Echo Manufacturing — the nation's largest manufacturer of leaf blowers. These ridiculous devices blare and screech like a dental drill gone berserk, kick up dirt and dust, and pump thousands of pounds of CO2 into the air. They create as much tailpipe emissions in one hour as a car does over 350 miles. Their grating roar can be heard from half a mile away. Robin Pendergast spends his days traveling around the country convincing city councils not to enact restrictions on these infernal contraptions.

Nicotine addiction, violence, misogyny, vulgarity, and noise are now part of the fabric of American life — brought to us by Andrew Schindler, Tom Whalley, Robin Pendergast and their capitalist brethren.

American culture was not destroyed by "liberals." American culture was destroyed by capitalists. As Vladimir Lenin said, "Capitalists will sell the rope for their own hanging." Anything for a buck.

Published in Bloomington Herald-Times, May 22, 2005